Evening Star

Evening Star

William Blake

Thou fair hair'd angel of the evening,
Now, while the sun rests on the mountains light,
Thy bright torch of love; Thy radiant crown
Put on, and smile upon our evening bed!
Smile on our loves; and when thou drawest the
Blue curtains, scatter thy silver dew
On every flower that shuts its sweet eyes
In timely sleep. Let thy west wind sleep on
The lake; speak silence with thy glimmering eyes
And wash the dusk with silver. Soon, full, soon,
Dost thou withdraw; Then, the wolf rages wide,
And the lion glares thro' the dun forest.
The fleece of our flocks are covered with
Thy sacred dew; Protect them with thine influence.

80s Movies

This is a conversation i overheard:

"Hey that's that one chick in that bad 80s movie."
"Which one?"
"Pick one, they're all bad."

i dare you to defy this statement. Name an 80s movie that by today's standards isn't lame.

Steve

Steve-

i am highly annoyed at you right now. While i went to Fair Grove Baptist you were nice to me... sometimes. You would usually say hi if i happened to be in your line of vision. Most of the time. You are the king of "How are you? Fine? Good" *keeps walking* i know you are real with your friends, and that's great. If you don't really want to talk to me, that's fine too. But be consistent. Don't ignore my wall posts on facebook and then act all excited to see me months later. Also, i have told you, as nice as i know how, that while you're kids are wonderful and cute, i don't really like kids. It isn't ok to unceremoniously dump your kid in my lap without asking. And no, saying "Thanks" doesn't count or make it ok. Just so you know. And while its nice that you know make an effort to be friendly, its a little past due.

Rebecca/Rachel (you never could get my name right)

Ticked

Ok, so today i saw someone i haven't really spoken to in about 7 months. Just about a year ago this person made fun of me for liking a particular artist. They also made fun of me at another time for the kind of music i listen to in general. Like i said, i've seen this person since this happened, but not very much, and today i saw them in the place they teased me. Normally teasing doesn't faze me, i can just brush it off. Today when i saw them, i got kinda mad. Not like really angry, just kinda ticked. There is nothing wrong with the artist i liked, and no reason to say i was stupid for liking them. And ya know what? The know an awfully lot of songs that are in that particular genre. Most by artists they have deemed "lame".

All i have to say to this person is this: You are every bit as cool as you act like you are.

Reasons To Unfriend Someone

Go Forth and Unfriend
November 17th is National Unfriend Day.
Maybe its just my sick sense of humor but i think a national unfriend day is pretty funny. Facebook is such a big deal that we have to have a 'unfriend day' to get rid of people we don't like as much as we thought we did.
One reason to unfriend someone is because you just broke up with them. Yea, sounds like a compelling reason to me...
Another is because they don't post anything. Ever. We're talking statuses, pics, notes, anything. These are usually the same people that never respond to wall postings, messages, or tags. The whole reason for being fb friends is to keep in touch, hard to do if they don't reply to anything.
You don’t know who they are. Ok, if you're connected with someone you don't know, at all then you have more problems than just figuring out who to unfriend.
If they cause drama;
If we are not friends in the real world;
People I work with;
People who are rude, or attack me for petty things;
Do not make the effort to get to know me in person;
People whom I went to high school with, especially those I was not friends with;
Any guy that I am interested in, this spells DISASTER;
People who are condescending and patronizing;
People who type in a way that I can't understand;
Attention-seekers;
Posting on ALL of my posts.....
ANYONE that invites me to Farmville. Ever.
You don’t like them anymore;
Obnoxious photos;
“I wanted a free Whopper.”

In January, Burger King launched the Whopper Sacrifice application, which promised each Facebook user a free Whopper if they unfriended 10 people. It sounded simple enough, but if you chose to unfriend someone via the application, it sent a notification to that person, announcing they had been sacrificed for the burger. Burger King disabled the application within the month when the Whopper “proved to be stronger than 233,906 friendships.”

This is my personal favorite: If they committed murder upon one of my close relatives and/or pets. This is grounds for unfriending.

Unfriending

Unfriending
So i was looking for a facebook friend to ask him somthing, and relized we werent friends anymore... i know some people who would be really hurt by this. i'm not, i really don't care, and i don't see it as a "personal insult" kinda thing. i unfriend people a lot; i'm no longer friends with anyone i went to high school with, or very many ppl i met in the Philipines. i've just recently deleted most of the kids at the camps i went to (except a few that live around here that i still see at soccer games and stuff) and a lot of the people i used to go to church with, was in choir with, or were 'friends of friends'. And yet i still have, at last count 174 friends. i've gone thru my 'friends' several times and there's still no one i can delete, cause they go to my dads church and would get mad (even tho they never talk to me) or i see them just often enough that it would be rude. So annoying. i actually like unfriending people, it gives me a sense of uncluttering my life. i still think i have to many 'friends' but oh well.

Clown Shoes

So i was in walmart, looking for some new sneakers and the ones i liked were sold out of every color but white. i don't like white shoes, so i tried to think of a way to make the shoes more fun. Sharpie! So i got the sneakers, and had a great time un-whitening them. Lol. Once i was finished they kinda look like clown shoes, but thats ok. i don't really have thing about clowns, like some people do. Yea they're weird, and kinda creepy, but i'm not scared of them, so having "clown shoes" doesn't bother me, and anyway they're fun! i love looking down and seeing bright colors, it cheers me up. And they're completely original and totally me!



J38 Extinction

"Assuming that complete recovery were instantaneous, would you be willing to accept a year of total paralysis below the neck to prevent the otherwise certain extinction of a species of animal?"

Depends entirely on the animal.... But prolly not. In fact unless it was something ridiculously cool like Giraffes or Platypuses or something i wouldn't. i definitely wouldn't if it was like cats or chihuahua. In fact i would prevent anyone from saving Chihuahuas. i really hate those things. i am mean and heartless (i've been told) about animals, but that's just me.

Worship

i went to a concert Sunday nite, and on the way home i was thinking about worship. There are all kinds of debates about this, this is just my opinion based on my experiences. i've had some pretty interesting worship experiences, everything from the reverent, solemn hymns to the all-out crazy jumping up and down at a concert. i think both are true worship, but appropriate at different times. i was at a worship service at camp, and it was so powerful, i had my hands in the air, and tears pouring down my face. That was one of the best nights of my Christan walk, i felt God move in my life, and the lives of others around me. It was powerful, but no less powerful than singing "Amazing Grace" at my church. i think worship is in the heart, no matter what you're doing physically. Didn't David dance to praise the Lord? i think it's perfectly acceptable to be physical in your praise, as long as its the appropriate setting. Just my opinion.

The Dark Side

i have a confession: i've gone over to the dark side. Not because they had cookies (tho they had those too), but because they had... i hate to admit this... a... a... puppy. Yes, you read that right: a puppy. A dog. An animal. i'm sorry! i couldn't resist. It was a dachshund, a 9-month old girl names Elise. She's my little Elliegirl.
Now to explain: my mom (the animal activist) fosters dogs, usually for only a few weeks at a time. Ellie is staying for about 10 days, 4 of which have passed. So i'll only be in this totally anit-me stage for a few more days. i have to admit, she's awfully cute! Ellie is a longhaird dachshund, if  i was to have a favorite breed of dog, it would be westie, but after that dachshund. i *like* little dogs, that are quiet(ish) and will play one minute and cuddle the next..... i'm actually having fun. Ellie is sitting in my lap as i write this, and she keeps trying to hit the keyboard with her nose. It's pretty cute! And it's kinda nice to have someone to follow me around, and to talk to even if they don't talk back. i will enjoy it for a week or two, but it isn't something i would want to make permanent. i'm not gong to get a pet, i'm just gong to enjoy the foster dogs my mom brings home... unless its a Chihuahua. i really hate Chihuahuas. Its also nice to have someone excited when i get home, jumping around and just excitd to see me! Instead of wanting/needing something the minute i walk thru the door. Just saying...

Scared

i cried on the way home today. i haven't done that in a long time. It's really kinda dumb, but i have to talk about it, and there's no one around to tell...

i don't want to have any children. i don't like being around kids, i don't like taking care of them, i don't want any of my own. i've been this way for a long time, i wrote a whoelother post detailing my reasons, so i won't go into them now, but some stuff happend this weekend that just really hit me hard. Friday i was talking to someone, and i was telling them a little more about why i don't want kids. They said they thought it would be sad if i didn't ever have kids. i've been told everything from "you'll change your mind" "its different when it s your own" to "thats weird" and "you shouldn't be allowed around kids, you're terrible". But that was the first time anyone has said it would be sad. They said it like they really meant it, like they felt sorry for me. It made me stop, i guess i hadn't ever really thought about it from that angle. Then this morning in the service the pastor said something that really scared me. He was teaching on parenting and he talked about a verse that says someday people will not have "natural affection", he said he thinks that means they won't love thier kids. He said he thinks people are already becoming like that causeof all the people that are willing to walk away from their kids, or hurt them, or just not care.  That scared me so bad. i don't want to be like that, but i already am. What the hell is wrong with me? Why am i like this? i don't know of even one other person like me... What is wrong with me?

i have to talk about it, and there's no one around to tell... there is no one that understands... i'm surrounded by people that love me.... but i'm so alone...

i'm leaving for a concert in a little while, i'll pretend to be happy and act normal, and no one will be able to tell....

Cool

Why "Cool" is possibly the worst thing i will ever say to you.
i have recently come to a conclusion: Cool is not.
Urban Dictionary defines "cool" as: "-When someone is "cool" they are popular, suave, and you like them."
i think when someone is 'cool' it means that yea, they're popular, they may be suave, they know the right people, know what to say, dress fashionably, and think they're all that. And they are. See, to me 'cool' means that you think you're all that. You act like you're all that. You act like you're better than others, and that's just lame. That is why if i intentionally call a specific person cool, its an insult. i have no patience for people with this attitude, and usually i just ignore them. They're a waste of my time to even think about, but if someone with this attitude does manage to get under my skin, i tell them exactly how "cool" i think they are. i've heard it's pretty fun to watch :p