Why?

Why do i let the same people hurt me over and over again? i tell myself not pay attention to them, their opinion doesn't matter; it isn't a big deal if they leave me out cause i have real friends. Yet, when i see their posts and pic on fb, or hear their stories, i'm right back where i was, hurt and confused by their neglect. Why am i the one left out? Why am i not worth their time? Why am i so inferior to them? What makes them so great?

The real question is: Why do i still care about what they think of me?

i know i'm worth much more than they say, so why do i let them get to me? Is it because i spent so many years with them? Is it because they are just "so cool"? Possible, and No.

i'm actually not sure what the reason is. i tell myself to grow up and get over them... and it doesn't work. i know i'm being stupid, but i can't quite seem to get them out of my system.

i wish i could say "Screw you" and get on with life, but i can't. Someone once told me that maybe i'm supposed to be a good friend to them, so they can see what a good friend is. But what if i don't want to be a good friend to them?? What if i want to treat them the same way they treated me?? Very unchristian attitude, i know, but that's how i feel sometimes.
What to do? Try to be a friend, and be trampled on, or ignore them like they ignored me (unless they need something)?? Oh choices.....