20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At lunch time sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguse your voice.
3. Everytime someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your trash can on your desk and label it "In".
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For smuggeling drugs".
7. Finish all your sentances with "In accordance with the Prophecy".
8. Dont use any punctuation Ever
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Order a diet water when you go out to eat, with a straight face.
11. Specify that your drive-thru order is "To go".
12. Sing along at the Opera.
13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme?
14. Put mesquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
15. Five days in advance tell your friend you can't attend their party becasue you're not in the mood.
16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.
17. When the money comes out of the ATM scream, "I Won! I Won!"
18. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives! They're loose!"
19. Tell your children over dinner "Due to the economy, we're going to have to let one of you go."
20. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity is to send this to someone to make them smile. It's called therapy.